If You Gave Vector A
by ZeroiceDragon
Summary: Many Chapters each about the objects that Vector recieves each chapter. Rated T for Misael colorful language
1. Chapter 1

**Zero:Well this is something for Whitewolf997 who's a fan of Vector.**

**Durbe:I have a bad feeling about this.**

**Zero:As the title says Vector will have miscellaneous items ranging from plastic toys to chainsaws.**

**(Durbe,Alito,Gilag,and Misael turns pale)**

**Vector:MWAHAHAHAHA!**

**Misael:I want to kill you Zero.**

**Zero:Eep! Spare me at least until I finish the story!**

**Durbe:You have officiallly landed us-**

**Vector:Chainsaws! Butcher Knives!**

**Misael:In hell.**

**Zero:This is also dedicated to my dear brother Eddie who's a big fan of Vector and please review!**

* * *

Chapter 1:Guitar

Durbe jumped 6 feet into the air from the horrible,loud,ear bleeding, and sounds like a dead cat yowling music.

"What the heck is going on?!"he thought crawling out of bed still in his pajamas. He passed by a groggy Misael who looked annoyed. As they suspected the music came from Vector's room.

"BLOOD! BLOOD! BLOOD! All over the floor as I chop people heads!"sang Vector way off tune.

Durbe and Misael covered their ears as Alito and Gilag entered the hallway.

"Vector SHUT UP!"shouted Misael as the silver hair barian laughed.

"I COULD BUT I RATHER NOT MISA-CHAN!"shouted Vector as Misael tore down the door with an axe and stomped inside.

Durbe,Alito,and Gilag cringe at the yelps of pain coming from the room. Misael exited shortly dusting his hands.

"What did you do?"asked Durbe.

"Knock Vector senseless."replied Misael as he went back into his room to catch more sleep.

"Vector put that thing down!"said Durbe exasperated as Vector sat on the couch strumming his guitar simply refusing to put it away.

"If I hear anoth-."said Misael as Vector began his horrible singing which earned him a punch so hard he tore a hole in the wall.

"I'll get the cement and crystals."said Durbe as he went away.

"Ouchie Misa-chan punches to hard."said Vector as he rubbed his swollen head.

"I AM NOT A GIRL FOR DON THOUSAND'S SAKE!"Misael screeched in anger as he chased after a laughing Vector.

"The last thing we need is Vector bringing home a boombox."thought Durbe.

Chapter 1 and 1/2:Boom Box

"DIE! MORTALS! DIE! When see King Vector pee in your pants!"shouted Vector except this time the music came from a boombox.

"Ughh how did I know this was going to happen?"thought Durbe placing a pillow on his face to muffle the loud music.

"VECTOR YOU BAKA! Shut the damn thing off it's still 7 am!"shouted Misael from his room.

"Sorry Misa-chan I didn't kniw that I was interrupting your beauty sleep."said Vector from his room.

"THAT DOES IT!"Misael shouted and stomped to Vector's room.

"Vector here's your black blob jelly,turkey legs,barian pig meat,and barian chicken wings."said Durbe as he gestured to the table.

"YAY LUNCH!"exclaimed Vector as he jumped onto his seat.

The others made sure to sit as far as away from him as possible especially Durbe and Misael. Vector 'accidentally' flung a spoonful of black blobs of whatever they are things at Durbe and Misael. Durbe took out a handkerchief and wiped his glasses.

"VECTOR GO TO YOUR ROOM NOW!"commanded Durbe his attitude more stormy than normal. Vector obeyed running away like a little kid.

"He's going to play his guit-."said Misael.

"Breaking human stones! Wait that's not right." "Breaking human cones! Wait that's not right either." "AHA! Breaking human bones!"sang Vector.

"Guitar."said Misael as he reached for a mallet.

"Time to hunt down a boombox and guitar."said Misael as Durbe face palmed.

* * *

**Zero:Sorry if you didn't like it was my first time writing something like this.**

**Misael:Who in their right mind would give Vector a guitar?**

**Zero:Me apparently.**

**Misael:Well yeah apparently you.**

**Zero:Whatever. Review!**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Frosting Bag

**Zero:This is the second chapter!**

**Misael:What does Vector get in this one?**

**Zero:Uh frosting bag?**

**Misael: (-_-?)**

**Alito:Frosting=cupcakes and cookies!**

**Misael:Yeah and if you eat them you'll get poisoned.**

**Zero:Review please!**

* * *

"Durbe what's a cupcake?"asked Vector as he looked at the other barian sitting on a chair reading a said nothing which made Vector pester him again.

"Durbe what's a cupcake?! Durbe what's a cake!?Durbe what's a-."said Vector in a childish voice.

"Aww for Don Thousand's sake it's something that human eats."said Durbe as Vector looked at him confused.

"Is it like hotdogs,popcorns,and pork chops?"asked Vector as Durbe slapped his forehead.

"No it's something human eat for dessert and it's really sweet-."said Durbe before Vector interrupted.

"Where can I get some?"asked Vector.

"You could buy one or make one yourself."said Durbe returning to his book.

"To make a CAKE!"exclaimed Vector as he walked into the portal he a few seconds later he returned.

"That was fast."said Durbe as Vector smiled sheepishly.

"Um where...do I...get things...to...make...a...cake?"asked Vector as Durbe face palmed.

"Vector listen closely you go to a store and head down to the bakery aisle and there you would find all the equipment you need."said Durbe getting irritated.

"Ok!"said Vector diving right back into the portal.

...Durbe realized he forgot to give Vector some money to buy whatever he needed...oh dear...

...

...

...

Meanwhile...

Vector walked inside the big building with the big giant signs that said 'SHOP'. He walked past some people and began to scan for the aisle of bakery or bakery of aisle or bakery aisle,ahh whatever. He found the sign and ran all the way to the back of the store. He found a big refigerator filled with boxed,Vector assumed it was cakes. He looked to his left and found a shelf of frosting bag. Grinning he took a whole armful of Frosting bags and returned to Barian World.

"Vector I forgot to-."said Durbe as Vector walked proudly into the kitchen arms filled with frosting bags.

"Vector you do realize you need more than just frosting bags to make a cake right?"asked Durbe as Vector looked at him sighed and decided to teach him how to bake a cake.** (Yes Durbe can cook)**

After 1 hour and a half the cake was ready. It was beautifully shaped thanks to Durbe's skillful techniques. It had creamy white stripes and laced flower along with a edible white rose.

"Vector hand me a frosting bag."said Durbe as a stream of frosting was squirted into his face flamed with anger.

"You wanted frosting."said Vector.

"The frosting BAG,Vector!"shouted Durbe as Vector laughed nervously. After Durbe finished decorating the cake a zombie like noise approached from the living room.

"Cake...I want cake..."said Alito walkimg and talking like a zombie. Vector squirted pink frosting at Alito's face.

"Bulls eye!"exclaimed Vector as Durbe knocked Alito unconscious with a frying pan?

"Vector ready to serve the cake? Vector?"asked Durbe but the silver hair prankster was nowhere in sight.

In Misael's room...

Misael was sleeping peacefully until a certain silver hair person entered the room with a frosting bag. Vector snickered to himself and squirted a black mustache and beard on Misael getting some on his soft golden hair. **(Vector you BAKA! You ruined his perfect hair!) **Vector crept silently outside and came face to face with a not amused Misael.

"Wait Misa-chan I thought you-."said Vector before the mustached and bearded emperor pounded him.

Meanwhile Durbe was busy trying to defend his cake from Alito and Gilag.

"Cake...cake..."they said zombielike.

"Be patient don't you think Vector and Misael want a piece?"asked Durbe as the mindless-only-wants-cake emperors grabbed at the cake.

"Want a piece of what?"asked Misael as Alito and Gilag bursted with Durbe chuckled a little.

"NOT FUNNY!"shouted Misael as he rushed toward the bathroom to wash his face.

"Also Alito why do you have pink frosting on your hair?"asked Gilag as Alito screamed.

"DON THOUSAND! I HAVE GIRL COLOR ON ME THE ENEMY OF RED!"screamed Alito in a high pitched voice also running into another bathroom.

"Funny he didn't realize that earlier."said Vector as Durbe turned to face him-BIG MISTAKE.

Durbe was squirted with black and white frosting dripping off his face.

"VECTOR YOU!"said Durbe his nornally calm demeanor snapping. Vector laughed until a abnormally good shot of frosting flew into his mouth causing him to choke when another went straight down his throat. No sooner a frosting fight started. Poor Misael and Alito who walked out all cleaned was showered with multi-color frosting making the room the color of a disco ball.

...

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The cake left unattended was taken by Don Thousand...

...

"Guess where is the cake?"asked Durbe as the emperors shrugged.

"This isn't funny the CAKE IS GONE!"exclaimed Durbe freaking out because he lost his masterpiece.

"Don't worry Durbe. I can make another cake."said Vector.

"No way in hell I'll ever eat your cooking!"shouted Misael as he backed away.

"Aww come on how bad can it be?"asked Vector.

"The symptoms are one of us exploding,laughing uncontrollably,or speaking in rhymes,or growing an extra head or clone,or-."said Durbe as Alito and Gilag interrupted.

"We get the point Durbe."said the two in unison for some reason they looked deathly pale.

* * *

**Zero:Chapter 2! Sorry if there wasn't something like swords or machine guns.**

**Vector:Cake?**

**(Zero looks at the black thing with something pink wriggling inside it)**

**Zero:No thank you Vector but see if Misael wants some.**

**Misael:You know perfectly well I don't!**

**Zero:Jeez I was just being nice! Review!**

**Misael:More like trying to get me poisoned...**

**Zero:What did you say!?**

**Misael:Nothing.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: Scissors**

**Zero:Welcome to Chapter 3!**

**Vector:Can I use the scissors to poke someone's eye out?**

**Zero:I don't know could you?**

**Misael:Zero!WHY YOU!**

**Zero:Hey it's his story he can do whatever he wants.**

**Misael:That's the problem ! He almost burned down a whole city with one match!**

**Vector:Hey how was I suppose to know if you combined Baria crystals with fire it cause a wildfire.**

**(Misael and Zero sweatdrops)**

**Misael:He also caused an Earthquake with the scale of 8 with a massage chair!**

**Zero:Really?**

**Misael:You think I'm lying?!**

**Zero:No.**

* * *

Vector watched curiously as Durbe used a silver snippy,snippy thingy to cut paper.

"Don't even think about it Vector."said Durbe as Vector reached for the thing on the desk.

"Why?"asked Vector as Durbe placed the pair of scissors away.

"Because you'll snip off one if your fingers or poke someone's eye out."said Durbe as Vector smiled one if his creepy then had realized he had said the wrong the nick of time the scissor was in Vector's hand.

"Vector give the scissors back!"said Durbe warningly as Vector ran out of the room. Vector ran into Alito at the hallway.

"Vector why do you have a scissor?"asked Alito as Vector grinned evilly. Poor Alito was so scared he pelted off the other direction.

"Hmm now that I think about it Misa-chan's hair is to long."said Vector an idea forming in his mind.

Misael having no idea what was going to happen was watching TV**(Yes they have a TV in Barian World)**

"I don't get why humans enjoy watching other humans do things in a metallic box that has sounds."grumbled Misael as he switched to another channel.

Vector saw Misael distracted by watching the TV he crept forward silently.

"RANK UP MAGIC BARIAN FORCE!"said Vector holding up the card as Misael's eyes grew dull. Surprisingly it worked! Quickly Vector grabbed the scissor and began snipping at Misael's long golden hair.

...

...

...

"Vector where are you?!"exclaimed Durbe trying to find the sneaky prankster as he entered the living room where Misael was sleeping.

"Oh dear..."said Durbe as he ran out of the room to warn Alito and Gilag.

...

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...

...

...

...

"VECTOR WHAT HAPPENED TO MY HAIR!"shouted Misael so loud the whole castle shook with fear.

Misael stomped into each room his eyes red with malice. If you added reptilian skin,spikes on his back,long rows if sharp teeth,and roaring then Misael would be Godzilla.

...

...

...

...

Durbe,Gilag,and Alito hud inside the room where the door was painted with cemet and bunch of spiky silver wires on the floor with detonators. Wait detonators!?

"He won't break in I hope."said Alito as Durve glanced anxiously at the door.

"Yeah he is like Misazilla or something like that."said Gilag.

"How long do you think it would take him to find Vector."said Durbe as the ithers shrugged.

"Who said I needed finding I'm right here."said Vector climbing out of the closet.

"Vector what are you doing here?!"said Durbe horrified.

...

...

...

Misael's sixth sense picked up where Vector is he stomped to the last unbroken door. And with a large golden nuclear blast he blasted open the door. JK

Here's what really happened he kicked the door down even with the cement on it and stomped inside. Somehow he managed to get through the bombs and wires and reached base camp.

"We are so dead!"screamed Alito.

"All because Vector got a scissor!"exclaimed Gilag.

* * *

**Zero:DUN DUN DUUUN!**

**Zero:Watch next time on the Misazilla punches MechaVector**

**Misael:My hair! He cut my hair!**

**Zero:So what did you think?**

**Vector:I cutted Misa-cha-,Misa-kun's hair!**

**Zero:And he doesn't seemed to be happy about it either.**

**Misael:VECTOR!**

**Zero:Review! And please feel free to post your ideas!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Zero:Welcome everyone!**

**Misael:Hn.**

**Zero:Eh ignore him he's just in a bad mood.**

**Misael:You would be to if your fans called you Misazilla or hey Misa-kun!**

**Zero:To understand what he is talking about please go to chapter3.**

**Durbe:What's this chapter about?**

**Zero: Vector gets an I-pad.**

**All the Barians Except for Vector:WHAT!**

**Vector:Cool! What's an I-pad?**

**Zero:You'll see now onward with the story!**

* * *

Chapter 3:I-pad

It was one of those regular boring barian day. Misael had almost gotten used to his cutted hair even though he had broke every bone in Vector's body for cutting his hair.

...

...

Just then Vector entered through the portal.

"Hey! Look what I found!"exclaimed Vector excitedly.

"More like steal."said Misael as Vector ignore his remark.

"Great...Vector...WAIT A MINUTE IS THAT AN I-PAD!"exclaimed Durbe as Vector looked at him confused.

"What's an I-pad?"asked Vector as Misael rolled his eyes.

"It's something humans play with and taps on all day with their fingers douchebag."said Misael.

"Well nobody asked you Misa-cha-,Misa-kun!"said Vector as Misael was held back by Alito and Gilag to not strangle Vector.

"Well there are these wierd thingies that when I tap on them it opens to a page and there's games on it."said Vector.

"It's called an app Vector and how did you manage to buy an I-pad?!"asked Durbe as Vector smiled evilly.

"I didn't buy one."said Vector.

"Look there's is a app called Clash of Barians!(Clash of Clans)"said Alito as he tapped onto the sooner the barians crowded around Vector and the I-pad.

"Oh look at the troops!"exclaimed Gilag. Indeed the troops for raiding seem so awfully familiar.

"I'm a barbarian?"said Alito.

"I'm A WIZARD!"exclaimed Vector with glee.

"I'm a...healer! But that's female troop!"shouted Misael as the other chuckled.

"Durbe your a barbarian king!"said Vector.

"And Tachyon is the dragon troop?"said Misael.

"And I'm a Golem?"said Gilag as the others laughed.

(To understand what they are talking about you must play the clash of clan app)

"Let's go on Thousand Tube!(Youtube)"exclaimed Alito as he exited out of Clash of Clans to the next app.

"This one!"said Vector as he clicked the first video if what to watch. The video showed Alito holding a bat and he was about to swing the baseball on the cone. Sadly Gilag stood way to close and was hit in the face.

"HAHAHAHHA!"laughed the barians except for Durbe and Misael who sniggered.

Another video showed Vector singing while playing his guitar.

"I RIP HUMAN ORGANS AND TOSS THEM ALL ON THE FLOOR. FEAR KING VECTOR YOU MORTALS!"exclaimed the Vector in the video.

"YOU SUBMITTED YOUR SONG INTO THOUSAND TUBE!"shouted Misael.

"Hey it got 2000000000000000 views and 345677777likes!"exclaimed Vector.

"And 1 dislike."said Durbe flatly.

"OH NO MY SUPERIORITY HAS BEEN DISLIKED! I MUST HUNT DOWN THE ONE WHO HAS DISLIKED MY SONG!"shouted Vector as a butcher knife appeared out of nowhere and into his hand.

"Calm down it's just one DISLIKE!"said Misael as Vector began to open a portal.

"Oh look at this one!"said Alito clicking to another video.

"Despicable Vector.(Despicable Me)"said Misael as Vector turned away from the portal and jumped right back into the group circle.

...

...

...

...

"Awesome freeze ray!"exclaimed Vector as he clapped happily.

"Why do I get this feeling that everything on this I-pad is based off of us?"asked Durbe.

"Because it is."said Misael as he scowled when the Vector in the video shot a rocket launcher at the Misael in the movie.

"Do we have a stalker?"asked Vector as the others shrugged.

"Let's play something else."said Durbe as Vector whinned but agreed shortly.

"Lets see Galaxy-Eyes Vale,Angry Misaels,Cut the Vector,and Baria Crystals Crush."said Alito swiping to the next screen.

"Now I think Vector is right we do have a stalker!"exclaimed Gilag.

"Yeah but why would he or she make apps about us?"asked Misael as Gilag shrugged.

"Maybe she's a fan."said Alito.

"Or he."said Durbe.

"Where's my Don Thousand?"said Durbe.

...

...

...

"Oh look there is a diary!"said Alito clikcing to the memo.

12:00 pm: The barians are looking at my diary.

12:01:Gilag is picking his nose.

12:03:Vector is going to the bathroom

12:07:Alito wants cake

12:10:Misael is strangling Vector because Vector spended all his gems in Galaxy-Eyes Vale.

12:20:Durbe is searching up how to charm a girl you like on Thousand Tube.

12:30:Vector is dancing on the table with cream all over his face.

12:40:Gilag needs to do the laundry it's his turn.

1:00:Durbe is reading The Barian Games again.

1:12:Vector is cooking and the whole kitchen is on fire.

1:30:Misael is playing pretend with his dragon plushies.

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"Oh My Barian God! We do have a stalker!"said Alito.

"You play with your plushies?"asked Vector to Misael.

"Be quiet I do not!"shouted Misael. Then a new entry appeared.

1:40 Misael lies that he doesn't play with his plushies.

"Get rid of that thing right now!"shouted Misael.

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...

...

* * *

**Zero:So who is the stalker?**

**Misael:You.**

**Zero:Nope.**

**Misael:Really.**

**Zero:Yep.**

**Misael:Whatever I need to breed a freaking Galaxy Eyes Rainbow Dragon!**

**Zero:Good luck took me 10 tries.**

**Misael:Please..please..please..**

**Misael:DAMMIT IT'S ANOTHER CRYSTAL DRAGON WHY DO I KEEP ON GETTING THEM! THIS IS MY 20TH ONE!**

**Zero:Calm down.**

**Misael:Review please.**

**Zero:Thank you!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5:Zombie**

**Misael:A zombie?**

**Zero:Yeah I forgot to mention Vector could also get livings things err...in this case undead things **

**Vector:Yes my zombie from the walking dead!**

**Zero:Now onward!**

* * *

Alito screamed in terror as he dove behind the couch.

"Alito this is the 50th time you have screamed during this movie."said Misael slightly annoyed.

"I can help it those zombies scare me!"said Alito as he ducked right back to the couch.

"I wonder what it would be like to have my own zombie."said Vector.

"Don't say that!"exclaimed Alito from behind the couch.

"Don Thousand please grant my wish I want a pet zombie."said Vector as Alito fainted.

* * *

**Next Day...**

Alito climbed out of bed. And found a greenish and gray lump on the floor which he prodded with his feet. When the lump didn't move Alito kicked it then 'lump' turned over and then...

* * *

All the other barians woke up when Alito screamed bloody murder.

"I'm going to murder him if he doesn't shut up."grumbled Misael.

"ZOMBIE! ZOMBIE! THERE IS A ZOMBIE IN MY ROOM!"shouted Alito as he crashed right into an unsuspecting Vector.

"Oh! My package delivery has arrived already!"said Vector happily as if on the cue the zombie walked out of the room slowly.

"Hi! Mr...ZOMBIE! I am your Master...Vector so you will obey me!"said Vector having no idea how scary the creature before him really is.

"Since he's your pet aren't you going to name him?"asked Durbe as an idea clicked in Vector's mind.

"THIS ZOMBIE'S NAME WILL BE STUPENDOUS,VICIOUS,VICTORIOUS,SUPERIOR THAN ALL OTHERS-!"said Vector.

"Cut the crap Vector."said Misael impatiently wanting to go back to sleep.

"HIS NAME SHALL BE...BOB..."said Vector dramatically as the other barians sweatdropped.

"Whatever I'm going to sleep."said Misael as Vector smiled evilly a plan cooking in his mind.

* * *

"Here Bob is your daily meal of fried brains."said Vector as Alito looked away in disgust.

"Vector can you find somewhere else to feed Bob except under the kitchen table?'asked Durbe as he drank his coffee.

"But Bob likes it under here." said Vector as Bob nodded slowly in agreement.

**"VECTOR I WILL HAVE YOUR FREAKING DARN HEAD!"**shouted Misael stomping into the kitchen as the rest of the barians pinched their noses. (Yes they have noses apparently).

"Did Bob used your room as a bathroom again?"asked Durbe as Misael shook with rage.

**"DID HE EVER?! THE WHOLE PLACE SMELLS LIKE A THOUSAND YEAR OLD DUNG ROOM!"**shouted Misael.

"That's because Bob is a thousand years old zombie."said Durbe as Vector play fetch with Bob.

**"THAT'S NOT THE WORST PART! THE WORST PART IS THAT MY ROOM JUST WENT TO A ASTRAL AND BARIAN WAR 2 WITH POO!"**shouted Misael as Alito winced his eardrums hurting.

"Misael calm down. Vector go clean up the mess."said Durbe as Vector whined.

"Do I have to?"asked Vector in his babyish Shingetsu voice.

"Bob is your responsibility-."said Durbe before he was interrupted.

**"YOU BET DON THOUSAND YOU HAVE TO! OR ELSE THERE WILL BE HELL TO PAY!"**Misael shouted even larger as Vector went to get the cleaning utensils.

* * *

"This is cleaning my room? **IT IS WORSE THAN BEFORE!"** shouted Misael as Vector rolled around the floor laughing.

Indeed he was correct, Misael's room had multi-colored walls with a mustache on his Tachyon Dragon poster and a scribbled above it with a arrow pointing to the picture had the words 'Butt-head'. Also large words of Misa-chan was scribbled in red crayon and zombie barf replacing zombie poop. The room smelled no better.

**"OUT VECTOR! NOW!"**shouted Misael when Vector was about to replace his clothes with dresses.

"I was just trying to help."said Vector.

"Get out now..."said Misael in a dangerously low voice.

Vector ran out the door still laughing as Bob followed with an angry Misael furiously scrubbing the walls.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6:Butcher Knives**

**Misael:I don't like the sound of this one.**

**Zero:You don't like anything I write.**

**Misael:True,True.**

**Vector:KNIVES!**

**Misael:Here we go.**

**Zero:Review because I haven't got much from the last chapter!**

**Misael:Because you didn't update much for this story.**

**(Zero rolls her eyes)**

* * *

Vector yawned with boredom as the barians awaited for Durbe to come home.

"Can someone help me with all these groceries?"asked Durbe as Misael and Alito went to help him. **(Apparently barians go shopping.)**

"What's with all thise weak humans things?!"asked Misael as Durbe placed them on the kitchen counter.

"Leave it to you 4 to not remember this special day."said Durbe as Misael crossed his arms rolling his eyes.

"What day is it today?!"asked Alito loudly as Misael glared.

"I know!"exclaimed Vector taking something out of the fridge.

SMASH!

Misael glared venomously at Vector his anger ready to blow.

"SMASHING PIE IN MISA-CHAN'S FACE DAY!"exclaimed Vector as Misael lunged at Vector.

"No Vector that was two hours ago."said Durbe as Misael beated Vector into a bloody pulp.

"The day that Sagamai Hashi's show cancels for the rest of the season! WAAAAAAH!"cried Gilag as Vector started laughing.

"No Gilag. And that show was cancelled for a year already."said Durbe.

**"WAAAAAAAAH! WAAAAAAAAAH!"**cried Gilag even louder.

"I'll get the baby bottle."said Alito.

"I'll get the duck tape."said Misael.

"I'll get the diaper,extra stretchable."joked Vector as Durbe facepalmed.

"Anymore guesses on what day it is?"asked Durbe as Alito piped up.

"THE DAY KOTORI MARRIES ME!"said Alito dreamily as Misael and Vector looked at him strangely.

"No did you guys seriously for-."said Durbe.

"EAT ICE CREAM DAY!"

"HIT VECTOR WITH A HAMMER DAY."

"DRESS MISA-CHAN IN DRESSES DAY!"

"WAAAAH SAGAMAI HASHI'S SHOW IS CANCELLED!"

"DEFEAT YUMA DAY!"

"DON THOUSAND SIT ON THE TOILET DAY!"

"WHAT THE HELL KIND OF DAY IS THAT!"

"IT IS A DAY AND WE SHOULD CELEBRATE IT!"

"**IT'S OUR 104 BIRTHDAY OF BEING BARIAN EMPERORS!"**shouted Durbe losing his temper.

"Oooooohhhhh."said Vector and Alito as Misael crossed his arms while Gilag cried.

"Now Misael you set the decorations. Alito you will help me with the recipes and Vector-**PUT THE BUTCHER KNIVES DOWN!"**shouted Durbe as Vector examined the shape metal blade with terrifying interest.

"What would happen if I threw this at Misa-chan?"asked Vector.

"Your internal organs will pop right out."threatened Misael darkly.

* * *

"Whaaaa spare me Vector don't kill me!"said Vector in a babyish voice as if pretending the ham could talk.

"Never! I shall slice you to millions of pieces! MWAHAHAHAHAH!"laughed Vector.

"Vector please don't viciously stab holes in the ham."said Durbe as Vector ignored him acting like a bloody psychopath.

"Alito can you please put the sandwiches in the red plates."said Durbe as Alito looked confused.

"Which one would that be?"asked Alito as Durbe sighed.

"The one on the right."said Durbe before Alito screamed.

Vector was waving pig intestines in front of Alito while laughing as Durbe was about to throw up.

"Vector throw the intestines away."said Durbe as Vector whined.

"**HE MEANT THE TRASHCAN NOT MY HEAD!"**shouted Misael the intestines on his hair.

Vector laughed until Misael once again knocked him unconscious.

* * *

"HAHAHAHA!"laughed Vector as he brutally sliced the carrots.

"Vector those are carrots not humans."said Durbe as Vector continued slicing away.

"Should have known better than to give Vector butcher knives."thought Durbe.

"There all done!"said Durbe as he served the last of the dishes and set out the cake.

The barian emperors took their seats and began to feast.

"Where's Vector?"asked Alito.

"Wait a minute I hear crying is Vector crying?"asked Misael ready to get his video cam.

Durbe headed to Vector who was clutching his bleeding fingers.

"My fingers they hurt!"cried Vector as Misael recorded the whole scene.

"Wait here I'll go get a bandage."said Durbe.

* * *

"CAKE!"exclaimed Vector lunging at the five stacked cake.

"BAKA! That's for all of us!"said Misael yanking him back.

In a bare minute frosting and caramel was flying everywhere and the barian emperors looked really angry.

"VECTOR YOU SLICED THE WHOLE CAKE INTO SMITHEREENS!"shouted Misael as the other barians looked really angry.

Let's just say for a birthday present was a punchbag named Vector.


	7. Chapter 7

**Charter 7:Girlfriend**

**Zero:Hi everyone!**

**Misael:So what is this one about?**

**Zero:Uh Vector getting a girllfriend?**

**Misael:The idea itself is ridiculous.**

**Zero:Yeah coming from you.**

**Misael:Psh Whatever.**

* * *

"Vector please get Alito out of the oven."said Durbe as Vector whined before opening the oven door.

"Then get all the hair coloring off Misael's hair."said Durbe.

"No thank you I can do that myself."replied Misael going to wash his hair.

Durbe grabbed his lists of Vector's pranks.

**Vector's Prank List: (This week)**

**1)Brought a rattlesnake into the castle**

**2)Cooked the detonators **

**3)Started an earthquake with a massage chair**

**4) Light Misael's hair on fire**

**5)Drew a graffiti of Don Thousand sitting on the toilet on Don Thousand's evil planning sheet**

**6)Woke a whole undead armada**

**7)Placed Alito in the oven**

"Don't forget hypnotizing Misael to kiss a gorilla."said Vector hanging upside down from the ceiling.

"Or using me as a bait to catch piranhas."said Alito as Vector smiled creepily.

"Or using Misael's fire breath to launch a cannon."said Gilag as Misael exited from the bathroom.

* * *

"When will Vector stop with his pranks?"asked Misael as Alito sighed.

"Maybe never."said Durbe as they all turn pale.

"I wish there was a way to keep Vector from pulling his pranks on us."said Alito as an idea clicked in his head.

"I have an idea!"exclaimed Alito standing on the sofa.

"Wow Alito has an idea,I must be losing my brain cells or the apocalypse has arrived already."said Misael flatly.

"Be quiet!"snapped Alito as Misael glared.

"We could get Vector a girlfriend!"said Alito as the others took time to consider.

"Yeah that is a great idea but Vector would scare the hell out of anyone not to mention girls."said Durbe as Alito smiled wickedly.

"There is one girl who Vector fears so much he won't even say her name."said Alito as Gilag gasped.

"You don't mean!?"exclaimed Gilag as Alito nodded.

"Who is she?"asked Misael as he looked at Durbe who shrugged just as confused.

* * *

Vector glanced around suspiciously.

"Where is everyone?"

"Vector we are having a guest over so please stop with pranks just for tonight."said Durbe from the kitchen as Vector narrowed his eyes a evil plan forming in his mind.

* * *

"You sure this Vanessa girl can scare Vector?"asked Misael as he glanced at Alito.

"Yep.150% sure."said Alito as he reached for a piece of apple pie.

"Alito get your hands away from my masterpiece! That is for the guest!"exclaimed Durbe as Alito whined childishly.

"Vanessa is coming we better call the Barian Defense Force."said Gilag hiding in the fridge as Durbe looked at him creeped out.

"Gilag why are you in the fridge?"asked Durbe as Gilag looked at him.

"Jeez I'll believe she's that scary when I see it with my own eyes."said Misael as Alito smirked.

"You wanna bet?"asked Alito as Misael's eyes flashed.

"Sure,if I win you stop talking for a whole month."said Misael as Alito looked at him horrified.

"And if I win you clean Bob's solid wastes for a month."said Alito as Misael shook his hand.

"Deal."said Misael.

* * *

Vector smiled as he sat down on his seat during dinner.

Suddenly the doorbell rang and Alito went to open it.

"Now Vector no tricks. Okay?"asked Durbe as Vector nodded.

As soon as the door creaked open.

* * *

**"VECTOR-KUN!"**

Vector turn pale as a ghost and jumped over the table in panic.

"Who invited her here!"exclaimed Vector as he ran to his room.

Misael was amused while Durbe was shocked and Alito was laughing.

Vanessa had Vector in a death-crushing hug while she showered his poor forehead with kisses.

"Help me!I'm being devoured!" cried Vector as Misael laughed.

* * *

"Aww Vector sit down and stop being grouchy."said Vanessa as Vector crossed his arms stubbornly.

**"NOW VECTOR."**said Vanessa with dark aurora billowing out behind her.

"Okay."said Vector meekly as he sat down still pale and stiff.

"So how did you two meet?"asked Durbe as Vanessa smiled dreamily.

"Vector and I fell in love when we first saw each other at Barian Kindergarden after we were reborn by Don Thousand."said Vanessa as Vector snorted.

"More like you threw yourself at my feet."muttered Vector.

BAM!

Vector was twitching on the ground a large bump of swollen skin on his head as Vanessa smiled.

"Now where were we? Oh yes how I met Vector."said Vanessa as Alito and Gilag sat further away from her.

"Little Vector was so charming. He also promised he would marry me when we grow up."said Vanessa as Vector sat back onto his seat.

"I wouldn't have said such things if you didn't point a scissor at my face-."said Vector flatly.

BANG!

POW!

SLAP!

"Please don't listen to him he's just being modest."said Vanessa as Durbe glanced uneasily at the unconscious Vector.

"Oh please don't worry I do that all the time."said Misael as the rest of the Barians sweat dropped.

* * *

"Which one of you unfroze her from my frozen time machine!?"asked Vector as his fellow Barians looked at Alito.

"You sir shall die a slow most painful death."said Vector as Alito shook in fear.

"But that's not the problem right now."said Vector as his eyes darted back and forth.

"Vector don't you think putting laserbeams,land mines,swinging back and forth axes,ready to unleash lions in cages,poison time bomb,acid gun,and a machine gun is a bit to much to keep Vanessa away?"asked Durbe as Vector shushed him.

"You don't know Vanessa she is a super Barian that can get through anything you can't be to prepared."said Vector as he struggled to stand up in his real gold armor suit.

"Why don't you tell her that you don't like her?"asked Misael as Vector glared.

"When someone holds a butcher knife against your face there is not much explaining you can do."said Vector as Vanessa knocked on his bedroom door.

"So why are we here?"asked Durbe as Vector tossed them guns loaded up with the strongest ammo ever...Bob's droppings.

"To protect me of course!"exclaimed Vector as the metal door broke open.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8:Girlfriend Part 2**

**Zero:So how was the last chapter?**

**Misael:Cool since Vector got tortured by his so-called girlfriend.**

**Zero:Of course since you love seeing him in pain.**

**Misael:So what if I do?!**

**Zero:Nevermind. Review please.**

* * *

**"AHAHAHAHAHAH!" **laughed the Barians well except for Durbe who snickered.

Vector was not amused,he was dressed in a frilly pink tutu,bunny ears,red nail polish,ballerina slippers,and silk gloves. Basically he looked like a clown.

"Isn't he the cutest?"cooed Vanessa.

Misael looked like he was going to die of laughing-itis and Vector wanted to strangle Vanessa. If he was only strong enough...

"Ridiculous."said Vector tearing out the costume as Vanessa frowned.

* * *

"So Vector are you going to drink from a baby bottle and eat mashed veggies?"asked Alito.

"I'M NOT A BABY!"shouted Vector as he threw his lunch on the floor which was prepared by Vanessa.

"Vector! Oh good your finished! Now let's go shopping!"Vanessa exclaimed as she dragged Vector away along with the table he was clinging on.

"Now I'm starting to feel bad for him."said Alito as Durbe crossed his arms.

"And we just lost a table."said Misael.

"And on that table was my five slice of ham,two slice of cheese,chopped onions,spinach, ten beef patties,five slice of lettuce,seven layers of ketchup,one ice cream scoop,two slices of mozzarella and one pound of chicken with two jumbo sized bread and now it's gone!"exclaimed Gilag.

* * *

"Try on this!"squealed Vanessa.

Vector sauntered back over inside the changing room and appeared wearing a rubber ducky outfit.

"No try on this!"said Vanessa as Vector headed back into the changing room and appeared wearing a Santa outfit.

"I shall bring blood and gore to the children's of the world! HAHAHAHAHAHA!" Vanessa facepalmed.

"No! Your Santa your suppose to give children toys and say ho ho."scolded Vanessa.

"I rather give kids organs."muttered Vector.

Vector entered the dressing ONCE AGAIN. This time he appeared dressed as Kaito...

"I'm Kaito and I kick Misa-chan's booty!"said Vector.

Luckily Misael didn't hear him.

"I summon! Some thing dragon with big blue eyes? No um big dragons with red horns? No. Ah! Whatever!" Vector stomped back inside the changing room.

* * *

"They've been gone for 5 hours already."said Durbe looking at the clock which was half splattered with peanut butter (because of Alito).

"Maybe Vector is not coming back ever aga-."said Misael hopefully when the door was torn of its hinges.

**"WE'RE BACK!"**exclaimed Vanessa.

"Terrific."muttered Misael.

Vector came inside the room carrying tons of shopping bags and boxes of all different size,shape,and colors.

"Poor Vector."said Alito innocently as Vector glared at him.

* * *

"This has gone for far enough!"shouted Vector as Alito watched him while munching his chips.

"But it's entertaining to see you get tortured by Vanessa."said Misael as Vector ignored him.

"So how are you going to get rid of Vanessa?"asked Durbe as Alito continued munching noisily.

"We could strap her onto a rocket and send her flying to outer space."suggested Vector as his fellow Barians coasted him strange looks.

"Why don't we handle this issue _non haphazardly_."said Durbe seriously.

* * *

**"WHAT IN BARIAN WORLD HAPPENED TO BOB!"** Vector screeched as Alito winced covering his ears.

Bob was dressed in a puppy outfit and the zombie tried to bark.

"Bob looks great in that outfit don't you think so?"asked Vanessa.

**"WHAT IN BARIAN WORLD HAPPENED TO ME!?"**Misael's shouting cracked all the windows in the Barian Palace.

Vector fell on the floor laughing his head off while Misael looked like some girl celebrity model who didn't win first place.

"Since you have long hair I figured that dress would suit you."said Vanessa.

**"I'M NOT A GIRL!"**shouted Misael.

"Hey Misa-chan! Don't forget to add some makeup when your done with your girlish tantrums!"exclaimed Vector before Misael's knuckle sandwich sensed him flying through the Barian Palace and into Gilag's cook pot.

**"OUCHIE! HOT! HOT! HOT!"**Misael smiled in satisfaction due to Vector's cry about his burning rear end.

* * *

"Vector,where are you taking me?"asked Vanessa as Vector fake smiled sweetly.

"To a secret place. Now close your eyes."said Vector as Vanessa obeyed him.

Now matter how tempting it was to abandon her just like that, Vector knew it was no good she would just come right back. He led her to the launch pad where a rocket waited for the them labeled _"Bye Vanessa hope to NEVER see you again!"_

"Vector where are we?"asked Vanessa as Vector escorted her inside the rocket and closed the door behind her.

"Vector?"

"Alito pull the lever now!"exclaimed Vector.

* * *

"Where did you send her?"asked Durbe sipping his coffee.

"A billion stars away from here."said Vector who was lounging in the couch.

"So now Vanessa can never return." Vector stated before doing a victory dance.

"Well it would seem your 'awesome plan' didn't work cause-."Misael opened the door revealing...

"VANESSA!?" Vector fainted in disbelief.

* * *

"My head hurts..."whined Vector rubbing his aching and swollen forehead.

"No surprise since Vanessa hit you with a pan 50 times."said Misael as Durbe handed Vector an ice pack.

"How did you get rid of Vanessa in the first place?"asked Misael as Vector scratched his head.

"Oh yeah I froze her inside a time machine."said Vector.

"No wonder she was inside this weird blue chamber thingy."said Alito as Vector glared.

"Okay. Let's focus here. How do we get rid of Vanessa?" Durbe looked at his fellow Barians who shrugged and Gilag who was snoring on the couch.

"How about we murder her and then flush her down the toilet?"asked Vector.

"To messy and the plumbing pipes will explode." complained Misael.

"Then blow her up?"

"Organs will fly all over the place."

"Butcher her up into little pieces and feed her to Gilag?"

"WHAT!?"exclaimed Gilag sitting upright.

"Valerie!" The Barians looked at Alito confused.

"Who's Valerie?"asked Durbe.

"Alito don't you dare!"shouted Vector as Alito smiled innocently.

"Well-." Alito was interrupted when Vector covered his mouth.

"Vector are you hiding something?"asked Misael as Vector shook his head.

Alito yanked Vector's hand away quickly."Valerie is Vector's-!"

"CRUSH!"shouted Alito breaking away from Vector's grasped trying to catch his breath.

"This is a new one."said Durbe as Misael laughed.

"Vector actually likes some girl?!"teased Misael as Vector breathed deeply trying not to blow.

"Okay. Alito escort Valerie here and I'll do the rest."said Vector.

* * *

"Who are you?"Vanessa looked at Valerie with distaste.

"Valerie."

Vector walked into the living room and plopped onto the worn out sofa.

"Trouble in paradise?"asked Vector as Vanessa pointed at Valerie.

" WHAT IS SHE DOING HERE?"asked Vanessa in a dangerous tone as Vector waved at Valerie.

Vanessa smacked his hand and Vector scowled.

"This is Valerie my childhood friend."said Vector.

"Nice to see you again Little Prince."said Valerie smiling.

"Valerie this is Vanessa my other childhood friend."said Vector as Vanessa glared.

"Glad to meet you Vanessa."said Valerie as Vanessa ignored her.

"I see how it is." Vanessa stomped out the door angrily and slammed it behind her.

"What happened?"asked Valerie as Vector shrugged.

"Have a seat. Would you like dinner?"asked Vector pulling out a chair as Valerie sat down thanking Vector.


End file.
